To be a true pop culture junkie, you have to go deep. Record nerds, comic nerds, horror nerds, movie nerds — they are all carrying around massive catalogs of information in their heads. This may make it difficult for them to relate to normal human-type people.
Sometimes I wonder if I really qualify. When I chat with my cousin Zack, I quickly realize I know virtually nothing about horror movies. He can thoughtfully discuss Bela Lugosi's latter work or compare and contrast the qualities of the various actors who portrayed Jason Voorhees. I like to think I'm a music nerd, but sometimes I wonder even about that.
Well, pride be damned, I'm going to come clean. There is some shit I know almost nothing about. Pop culture is just too massive. I cannot possibly keep up with it all and still pay my bills. So for your edification, I present my list of Pop Culture Confessions.
- I own no hipster records. It's a lot safer to say that than it was a few years ago. Let me be quick to add: it's not that I hate hipster bands. They just don't interest me. This might seem less surprising if it weren't for the fact that I have a reasonably large music collection. (iTunes tells me that I currently have 23,842 "songs." I've got some vinyl, too.) I have no Wilco. No Arcade Fire. No Postal Service. No Daft Punk. None of that. I'm not really sure why. This could change at any time. (I remember telling someone in the mid-90s that I wasn't that big of a Dylan fan. My record collection would beg to differ these days.) I'm just not into whiny white boy music right now.
- I've never seen an episode of Doctor Who. I have no opinion on which Doctor is the best. I only vaguely know what a "tardis" is. We can still be friends, right?
- I've also only watched one episode of Breaking Bad. Oh, come on. Sunday night is/was also the night for "Treme," "Mad Men," and "Boardwalk Empire." How much television can one person watch in a night?
- I gave up on True Blood. And Dexter. Speaking of Sunday nights. These showed so much promise. But no. I quit on True Blood once they introduced fairies (faeries?). And Dexter was just . . . overkill.
- I hated Nirvana when they broke. So, I am the exact right age to love, love, love Nirvana, but I don't. When I was 18, I was listening to Miles Davis and John Coltrane. I'm not saying that to be snooty, it's just the truth. I sort of feel like I missed something big with my own generation. I own Nevermind now, but it has no nostalgia for me.
- I bought a bunch of Dave Matthews records and even saw DMB in concert. In Charlottesville. I realize this is a capital crime in hipsterdom and not without some reason. Jam bands turned improvisation into a masturbatory exercise and the douche level of DMB is pretty high. But I didn't buy any Phish records.
- The only comic books I bought before I was an adult were Archie comics. The medium just didn't reach me when I was a kid. I didn't even know anyone who was into comic books. I don't think my town had a comic shop and I doubt my parents would have taken me to one if it did. I totally get how cool they are and understand the obsession. I also enjoy them to a fair degree now. But I lack any real street cred on this topic.
Whew. That feels better.
Need to get anything off your chest?